The title of this blog has never made more sense to me than it does today. There are two flaws (of many) that have that continue to plague me. 1. I’m always right. 2. I’m never wrong. You can imagine what kind of havoc these two flaws cause. Then there are three personality dispositions that get me in even more trouble. I have a very critical eye, a scathing tongue, and feel everything deeply. I am sure that these three dispositions can be redeemed. There are many areas within the church that need a critical eye. A scathing tongue can be helpful in dealing with sin, and the lies that we tell one another. And passion can obviously be beneficial in the church in motivating, gathering, and rallying people when done in an edifying manner.
However, it’s when all of these traits/flaws marry that I find myself in deep, deep trouble. Whether discussing how someone preaches, manages people, organizes a ministry, spends money, etc., my general approach is 1. Point out what’s wrong in a sarcastic and demeaning way. Sometimes I even find myself camouflaging this under a veneer of charm. Then 2. Defend my position vehemently. The irony of it is that today this very thing happened in defense of how we preach the gospel, the very message that presupposes our own deficiencies, inabilities, and weaknesses.
The water gets muddy for me specifically because my mind knows the concept that I elaborate is true, but my emotions feel it stronger than they ought. While God gave me both mind and heart to be used to edify the body of Christ, they too are still not wholly His. The gospel allows me to freely speak to my own inadequacies and extend enormous amounts of grace to those around me. The fact that I have an obvious inability to extend grace to certain people is evidence that the gospel must take root further in my heart. I must revisit consistently the message of my own depravity. I must revisit consistently the truth that God saved me, NOT because I am ever right. When God saved me, he did give me certain spiritual gifts, but, to quote a friend of mine, being right isn’t one of those.
All this to say, as the gospel takes root in us, it makes us fully human. As the gospel takes root in me, I become less and less the distorted version of me that sin has created, and more and more the redeemed version of me that God rescued. This doesn't mean that we become personality-less, passionless, cookie-cut Christians, but, that we still contend for truth, fight false teaching, point out sin, but all in the grace that has been extended to us. That we also, forgive with great emotion, show compassion with strength, vehemently show mercy. All because He did it for us. All of those things.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Friday, August 26, 2011
Training for the Marathon
At the risk of sounding cliche, I have been forming many spiritual connections with my marathon training. There are certainly the obvious ones, like "running the race set before us" and the necessity for training in the "marathon of life". bleh! But there are others. Ones that are deeper for me. Connections and things I'm learning that I never would have learned if I hadn't begun this process.
Let me give you the back story. I got fat. I went to Nicaragua and got terribly sick to my stomach, over the course of the next month and a half I lost 15 pounds. I'll let you figure out how. I wanted to keep the weight off so I started running again. The first day I went out and ran .85 miles. It was painful. I used to play soccer. I used to be able to run forever... and now, .85 miles. Humbling at best.
I continued running and worked up to running about 10-12 miles a week. I'd run 3 times a week. A friend of mine decided he was going to run a marathon and I decided it would be a pretty neat accomplishment, so I went for it. And here I am, 6 weeks away from running it. It's been exhausting, humbling, painful, frustrating, time-consuming. I have a long way to go in these 6 weeks still. It's been many things, and I haven't been nearly as disciplined as I ought. Which leads me to what I've been learning.
1. Discipline takes time.
I think it's easy for many of us to want to become disciplined people in an instant. We set up a plan, organize our schedule whatever it may be, but discipline is formed over long periods of time. It isn't just deciding one morning "I'm going to be disciplined", it's a lot more involved. It's been a matter of prayer, honestly. I've prayed to have the strength to get up and run, mainly because I wake up and can't feel my knees or feet at times.
2. We must rest
This is such an awesome thought. I read this verse the other day Psalm 3:5 "I lay down and slept;
I woke again, for the LORD sustained me." The very fact that we have to rest is a beautiful concept. We are the creature, not the creator. Every single day for 6-9 hours we all must stop everything that we are doing, accomplishing, working towards and close our eyes and reset. A humbling concept, indeed. What are we that God would be mindful of us? There have been times where I have run too many days in a row harder than I should have. I paid for it the next couple of days. God wired us to realize just how dependent we are upon him.
3. Endurance
It's difficult to run and not think about endurance. James talks about endurance, Jesus endured, Paul references endurance. Endurance, being able to deal with difficulty, struggle, hurt, pain, temptation in a successful way for a long-period of time. I went out for a 15 mile run last Saturday. It was hot. I made it 9.5. And I was slapped in the face with a picture of just how big of a moron I am. I do this with Jesus all the time. I presume more of myself than I am. I don't realize that he carries me every step of the way. My endurance isn't something that I have trained myself for, it is something that he gives to me consistently as I come to Him for grace.
Hebrews 12 is obviously the verse that has been on my mind a lot. When I go to run the marathon, I'm anxious to see my wife and other friends that will be there to support. That will energize me. 26.2 miles is a long way, but it is not nearly as long of a way when I remember that I'm not the first to do this. Millions of people have done this before me and are a testament to the fact that I can finish, and I can finish well.
Let me give you the back story. I got fat. I went to Nicaragua and got terribly sick to my stomach, over the course of the next month and a half I lost 15 pounds. I'll let you figure out how. I wanted to keep the weight off so I started running again. The first day I went out and ran .85 miles. It was painful. I used to play soccer. I used to be able to run forever... and now, .85 miles. Humbling at best.
I continued running and worked up to running about 10-12 miles a week. I'd run 3 times a week. A friend of mine decided he was going to run a marathon and I decided it would be a pretty neat accomplishment, so I went for it. And here I am, 6 weeks away from running it. It's been exhausting, humbling, painful, frustrating, time-consuming. I have a long way to go in these 6 weeks still. It's been many things, and I haven't been nearly as disciplined as I ought. Which leads me to what I've been learning.
1. Discipline takes time.
I think it's easy for many of us to want to become disciplined people in an instant. We set up a plan, organize our schedule whatever it may be, but discipline is formed over long periods of time. It isn't just deciding one morning "I'm going to be disciplined", it's a lot more involved. It's been a matter of prayer, honestly. I've prayed to have the strength to get up and run, mainly because I wake up and can't feel my knees or feet at times.
2. We must rest
This is such an awesome thought. I read this verse the other day Psalm 3:5 "I lay down and slept;
I woke again, for the LORD sustained me." The very fact that we have to rest is a beautiful concept. We are the creature, not the creator. Every single day for 6-9 hours we all must stop everything that we are doing, accomplishing, working towards and close our eyes and reset. A humbling concept, indeed. What are we that God would be mindful of us? There have been times where I have run too many days in a row harder than I should have. I paid for it the next couple of days. God wired us to realize just how dependent we are upon him.
3. Endurance
It's difficult to run and not think about endurance. James talks about endurance, Jesus endured, Paul references endurance. Endurance, being able to deal with difficulty, struggle, hurt, pain, temptation in a successful way for a long-period of time. I went out for a 15 mile run last Saturday. It was hot. I made it 9.5. And I was slapped in the face with a picture of just how big of a moron I am. I do this with Jesus all the time. I presume more of myself than I am. I don't realize that he carries me every step of the way. My endurance isn't something that I have trained myself for, it is something that he gives to me consistently as I come to Him for grace.
Hebrews 12 is obviously the verse that has been on my mind a lot. When I go to run the marathon, I'm anxious to see my wife and other friends that will be there to support. That will energize me. 26.2 miles is a long way, but it is not nearly as long of a way when I remember that I'm not the first to do this. Millions of people have done this before me and are a testament to the fact that I can finish, and I can finish well.
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